Every story of adversity is a story of strength
What are your resources that help you cope?
Have you ever found yourself stuck in bad memories or fearful thoughts? We tend to go ‘on repeat’ playing the most painful memories and relive those events many more times.
This can become an extremely exhausting trap. But can a memory of a painful event be seen and even remembered differently?
We cope because we all have resources for that. It can be personal qualities within us, hope, our social context – family, friends, even our pets giving us emotional strength.
If you stop for a moment, and ask yourself – “How did I manage despite all I had to go through? At that difficult time, what allowed me to cope? I am still here today after all, must have done something right! Who was my greatest support in difficult moments?”
In those answers you will find your most valuable resources that keep you going today and every day.
Nothing happens all the time
No matter how bad we feel, nothing happens all the time – there are always moments when we feel better, even just a little bit. Look at those moments, what is happening at those times when you feel good or even just a little better? There is always something that works well in our life. If you can’t find it in the present, look for it in the past. When was the last time you felt happier, despite the difficulties, what was happening then? What people around you noticed about you?
No matter how painful our memories are – once we include the narrative of our ability to cope in that experience, our memories about it are changed forever. This way we can take care of our emotional well-being and mental health.
HPPsupport written by Skirmante S
More From This Category
A discussion with solution focused coach. In last week’s post, we shared how Solution Focused Coach Skirmante introduced the topic of stress and ways it shows up in our bodies and behavior. Continuing this week's conversation we dive into some tips on how to manage...
In our psychosocial support program "Emotional Suport & Wellness" we offer voluntary service that is focused on creating a positive emotional experience through a conversation. Our volunteers listen and ask useful questions following approach called "Solution...
A discussion with solution focused coach. A solution focused coach Skirmante Sabataityte, as well a co-creator of "Emotional Support & Wellness" program at The Hague Peace Projects, is discussing a topic of stress and ways to eliminate it. She briefly describes...